Back in my native Los Angeles, New Year’s Eve events are usually split into two categories: invite-only to some glitzy house party in the hills, or a pay-your-way-in club event somewhere in the city. For the former, the demographic will consist of several guys with way too many rings and wide brimmed hats who begin every conversation with “I’m just working on my music right now”; for the latter, you’ll find those visiting L.A. just for the holidays, especially those hoping to get a selfie with a celebrity, none of whom they’ll find at such an event.
But Dubai is not L.A. and the huge range of NYE events on offer is something that requires more detailed analysis. So after an extensive set of research I’ve gathered from the city, these are the available events, depending on what kind of dude you are.
That Guy
Linen jacket. Loafers. Spenny watch. Wide brimmed hat. Blue Checked Instagram account. Has at least three numbers saved in his phone as ‘Do Not Answer’. We secretly hate that guy, yet deep down, we’re all a bit envious.
The Mandarin Oriental Jumeira, Dubai has an exclusive NYE event at ‘The Bay’ where the champagne and lobster flows over a festive night of live DJ performances literally right on the beach. Nothing beats a cheeky midnight swim. Book here
Where else will you find that guy? Probably at the Pool Cabanas at Raffles Dubai, where that guy can be found straight lampin‘ in his own cabana, drink in hand, phone in the other, wondering what models he should put on the guest list. Call 04-324 8888 or email [email protected] for a reservation
The Guy Who Just Wants to Party
When the drinks are flowing, the lights are flashing, and you’ve repeated: “So, what’s your sign?” for the tenth time, who really cares if you tied your bowtie correctly?
The Conrad Hotel is having a NYE blowout at Kimpo, and if pretty girls and vibrant DJs are your thing, then we can guarantee you’ll have a good time. Find all the info here
Another option for ‘how did I spend AED4,000 last night?’ is club Amazónico ‘Jupiter’s Jungle‘, in the DIFC. If you’ve spent more than 5 minutes in Dubai, you’ve undoubtedly heard this name before, but still, you can’t go wrong with tropical techno vibes.
Booking is essential, so do that here [email protected] +971 4 571 3999
NYE at Nonya, according to all the girls in my office who will be attending, is supposed to be a night to remember (or not, depending on your choice of beverage). Book here
Guy Who Gets in Without a Reservation
This guy dresses in a variety of threads, but one thing is for sure: whatever he’s wearing, that’s what we should all be wearing.
To celebrate NYE, Atlantis, The Palm is hosting an exclusive Gala Dinner with a live performance from the one and only, Sting. Naturally, we all want to go to this, but if you do think you’re worthy enough to attend, you can find all that here.
‘I’m Just Visiting’ Guy
Technically, I’m nearly in this category myself, but for those of you who are spending your first ever NYE in Dubai, how could you want to do anything other than watching the fireworks take over the night sky by the Burj Khalifa? Black Tap, Dubai Mall with its outdoor Promenade Seating is the perfect location to experience, what is said to be, an unforgettable light show. Book here
Dinner and festivities at COYA Dubai, which features a Peruvian menu, an elevated VIP terrace, and a super cool interior that’ll receive more than one reply to your Instagram story asking ‘where are you? That looks sick’. Book here
Mediterranean dinner at Café Bateel, Dubai Mall, which will provide yet another VIP view of the legendary fireworks erupting around the Burj Khalifa. Just a word of warning, from one tourist to another, make sure you give yourself a generous amount of time for arrival, because traffic is supposed to be very gnarly. Book here
To all the single guys out there looking for love on the most promising night of the year, if you need some additional tips on how to smell your best, click here
Happy 2024, and good luck.
